Christland, Jesustopia, Spiritstan. . .

While quite a number of us in the U.S. are celebrating another victory for President Barack Obama, I heard that some want to leave America now that this “Muslim, Socialist, Kenyan” has been resoundingly re-elected.

I’m all for it.  I’m in.  Well, I personally don’t want to go (I already spent 8 years pretending I wasn’t here, hanging my sorry head in shame, while George the Second, the Decider, represented America and pretended to be a competent commander in chief while wrecking the economy and any credibility we had in the world. . .).  But, this seems to be the perfect opportunity to reveal my Special Plan for “Exceptional” Christians.  Come on Kids, gather ’round.

I’ve given this a lot of thought over the years (maybe an hour or two), but I think millions are gonna love it.

We take all the huge piles of holy money by God’s Richest and Most Blessed (Koch, Adelman, Trump, Romney, etc) and use it to buy an exceptionally large piece of real estate, say An Island.

Then, we put out the call, the prayer chain, and call up the Free Pulpit Preachers and Bible Children to COME to the STATE of SALVATION, the ISLAND of Blessed Bliss, the LORD’S LAND, or whatever the Spirit leads us to call it.  Here we will finally be able to show the world, by living apart from the world, just how sinful the world is and we can live the way HE wants us to live, reading our Bibles and going to Church every hour of every day (heck, LIVING in CHURCH!  the WHOLE LAND will be a church!).  And we’ll show the world (though “The World” doesn’t care and won’t be watching) HOW AWESOME is OUR GOD, OUR FAITH and OUR RIGHT OPINIONS ABOUT EVERYTHING!

It’s time.  This is the kairos moment, the hour of decision, the voice has gone out to the ends of the earth.  America is lost, corrupt, run by socialists and gays and women and God-damned Reason!  We’re outta here, I hear them say.  As they fade off to their own place, with their own laws, own government, own schools, own books and courts and everything, ALL LED BY GOD’S OWN FAITHFUL.  Spiritstan lives!

THEN, all the rest of us in the LOST WORLD OF FALLEN AMERICA, Democrats, Republicans, Independents, Religious, Atheist, Women and Men, Gay and Straight, Black and White and Red and Brown, Young and Old, can move along forward with building a better, healthier, more intelligent and reasonable nation, in the light of the Constitution and our active, collaborative minds.

I have a dream. . .

{Oh, and Mr. President, feel free to suggest this revelation to any who stand in the way of your inclusive, pluralistic agenda}.

And, along these lines, I suggest reading “A Confederacy of Takers” (WP). . .Let My People Go!


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